Something changed yesterday, a glimmer of hope! I felt energized after pranayama. Typically it's just me gasping (or so it feels like) for air. Today was the opposite, I rolled over feeling fatigue in my body and anxious in my belly and mind. I have been so surprised at how the practice of breathing can have such a profound effect. Just the act of being silent can either send me into a deep meditative state or make my skin crawl, the need to escape.
Speaking of needing to escape......
That's something I'm really good at. I dig myself a deep hole, crawl into it, bring everybody with me, then that's when I make my escape.
With this practice of pranayama there is no escape. You are with you and only you. The deepest parts if you come to the surface, wether or not you want them to.
I'll keep going even after days like today. Abhyasa and Vairagya. Keep saying it......